


Love and Dinosaurs

by silver_sun



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Dinosaurs, Kissing, M/M, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-10
Updated: 2012-05-10
Packaged: 2017-11-05 03:18:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/401877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silver_sun/pseuds/silver_sun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Walking to the pub, Andy thinks, should have been easy, but then Captain John Hart ran into him – literally. And then his day got really strange.</p><p>Written for Torchwood-Fest for blissfullyd</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love and Dinosaurs

Title: Love and Dinosaurs  
Characters: PC Andy/Captain John Hart  
Rating: M  
Summary: Walking to the pub, Andy thinks, should have been easy, but then Captain John Hart ran into him – literally. And then his day got really strange.  
Warnings: None.  
Contains: Sort of AU as doesn't follow Torchwood canon from mid series 2. Fade to black sex scene. Mass extinction of dinosaurs 65 million years ago.  
Setting/Time: Mid series 2, after Meat but before Reset.  
Beta: dreamscapemusic  
A/N: Written for Blissfillyd for the livejournal comm Torchwood-fest fic exchange.

 

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The summer sun is shining brightly, creating a patchwork of dappled evening light and shade across the path as Andy walks through the park.

Andy glances at his watch. Ten to seven. He should reach the Queen's Head by seven. He hopes that the lads haven't decided to arrange anything too outrageous for Alan from SOCO's stag-do. He can still remember all to well Mike's from three years ago, and all the apologies they'd had to make over the business with the inflatable sheep and the cowboy hat.

Still thinking about it, Andy doesn't see the man running out of the trees bordering the path until he collides with him.

Landing hard on the path, the man on top of him, Andy is too surprised to do anything other than stare.

The man, who's wearing a military jacket that went out of use more than a hundred year ago, grins at him, not looking in the least bit sorry that he's knocked him over.

Andy's eyes widen as the man moves, and he feels something hard poke in his side. Andy's not sure why the first thing that springs to mind is that the man on top of him is very pleased about where he's landed. "Is that..."

"Sword hilt unfortunately." There's a wicked glint his eyes. "Although if you've got time later, maybe I really will be pleased to see you."

"You don't even know me," Andy says, sounding a little flustered. "And who are you?" Andy asks wondering why so many odd things happen in Cardiff and why they always seemed to happen when he really wants to be somewhere else.

"Captain John Hart." John glances behind him, then says, "And who are you? Apart from comfortable to lie on."

"Andy..." Andy stops before mid sentence as a Blowfish dressed as a cowboy runs out of the same group of trees John had run out of and points a long silver tube at them.

Andy makes an irritated noise, which he hopes will leave both fish man and John, if that really is his name, in no doubt about how unimpressed he is with this whole silly stunt. "Alright, you've had your fun. Now where are the cameras?"

"What?" John Hart says sounding distracted as he slowly reaches behind his back for a gun that's pushed through his belt.

"The cameras," Andy says shaking his head. He supposed he'll at least have something to tell the lads when he finally gets to the pub. If they believe him that is. "I mean this has got to be one of those set up shows, like the one with the dog with the giant phone, or the one where they pretend to crush somebody's car."

The John stares at him. "Are you really that stupid, or do you have to practice?"

Andy is about to reply, when the blowfish shouts something in a language Andy doesn't understand or recognize and raises the tube.

The John grabs Andy, and pulls them both to the ground.

The shot the blowfish fires zips over their heads.

"You saved my life," Andy says shaken.

"I'm ireally/i not that kind of a guy," John says, sounding amused that anybody would think that he is. "But you make a great human shield."

"Thanks," Andy says sourly.

Blowfish shoots again, the laser blast striking the tree just above their heads, showering them with bits of charred bark and leaves.

Pushing Andy off him, John scrambles to his feet. "As much fun as this is, it's time I got going."

Then without a backwards glance at Andy or the blowfish, John starts to run.

The blow fish points its gun at Andy,

"It's shooting at me too." Andy runs after him. "Who the hell are you, and what is going on?"

"You really want to do this now?" John says incredulously.

"Um no?" Andy ducks as another blast of laser fire zips over their heads.

Running through the park, Andy doesn't really have any plan other than putting as much distance as he can between himself and the fish man

A few people stare at them as the hurry out of the park and on to the street. Hoping to avoid anybody getting caught in the cross fire, should John use one of the guns on his belt, Andy decides the best option is heading away from the shopping streets to a more industrial area.

"This way!" Andy shouts, grabbing hold of John's arm and dragging him towards a row of old warehouses. "We should be able to lose him in here."

Despite the fact that it's real, and really, Andy thinks, a fishman with a laser gun shouldn't ever be real, it still feels like a film. It certainly doesn't seem like something that should be happening to him.

The warehouse is empty apart from a few old crates and a couple of large, rusting pieces of machinery.

Crouching down behind one of the them, breathless, annoyed and rather more scared than he wants to admit, Andy says, "Okay, what is going on?"

"Short version," John says, still sounding like he's enjoying the whole think far too much. "I tried to sell him some bees, and then things went a bit wrong."

"What would a fishman want with bees?" Andy whispers, hoping talking doesn't alert it to their location.

"He wanted find the holes in reality apparently." John peers round the machinery to see if the fishman is still there. "I told him it didn't work like that. But he wanted them anyway, so who was I to argue? Then he got all bent out of shape when they just flew off."

It's the most ridiculous story Andy has ever heard, but somehow it actually sounds like the truth – nobody would ever try to pass something so utterly weird off as the truth unless it actually was. Despite that Andy isn't any more willing to trust him, as while it might be the truth, he doubts that it's actually the whole story.

The shooting suddenly stops, the warehouse silent apart from the steady drip of water from a damaged pipe.

"Do you think he's given up?" Andy asks, hoping that John has a better idea of what is going on.

Standing in the doorway to the warehouse the blowfish unclips one of the small metal balls hanging from the belt around his waist.

John rolls his eyes, and opens the cover on the leather wrist band he's wearing. Inside is what Andy can only describe a futuristic retro computer thing.

The blowfish gives them an approximation of a smile and then throws the metal ball at them.

John pushes a couple of buttons, and the air around him starts to shimmer blue.

The metal ball lands on the ground next to Andy's feet, the small red flashing light on it blinking faster and faster.

Grabbing hold of John's arm, Andy asks urgently, "Will that thing disarm it?"

John doesn't answer,

For a moment warehouse seems to be visible only through a thick blue fog, then it's gone altogether, bomb exploding just moments after they disappear.

x0x0x0x

They materialise in a narrow rocky gully, a sluggish trickle of a stream running along its base. Plants, mainly huge fern like things that Andy doesn't recognise, crowd the steep slopes. While above their heads oversized dragonflies drone drone in the humid air.

"We're in the Amazon bloody rainforest, aren't we?" Andy snaps, too annoyed at the moment to considered being amazed at the fact that they've teleported halfway around the world. "That's just great."

"You grabbed hold of me, I hadn't programmed it for multiple transport," John says angrily, pushing Andy away from him.

"You we're the one who got me chased by a fishman with a laser gun."

"We could have been scattered as atoms over twenty different time streams. You should be really fucking grateful that we're alive at all."

"Oh." Andy shivers despite the tropical heat. He can hear the fear just beneath the anger in John's voice, and it's very real.

"Yeah, well I've got out of worse," John says. He opens the cover on the control thing about his wrist. His face falls. "Oh shit."

He presses a few buttons, then swears again. Snapping it closed he turns to one of the tree ferns and punches it.

"Is something wrong?"

"Sharp one, aren't you?" John says sarcastically, stopping. "Of course there's something wrong. It's out of power, so I'm going to have to wait until it recharges before I can go anywhere."

"We can go anywhere," Andy corrects him. John has got them stuck wherever here is and John is going to get them both out of it. "So how long is that going to take?"

"I don't know," John says irritably, as he rubs his scratched knuckles. "It charges using ambient electricity, so if we'd landed in a city pretty damn fast."

"It's going to be a while, isn't it?" Andy says looks round dejectedly. A small lizard on the trunk of one of the tree ferns stares back at him, then blinks and skitters away.

"Yeah. It's not recognising anything apart from ultra low background levels." John points at the faint blue light on the only lit panel in the device. "Where the hell are we? Nowhere should be this dead."

"Dead?" Andy really doesn't like the sound of that at all. "What do you mean dead?"

"Electrically dead. 21st century Earth should have all sorts of stuff. Doesn't matter where you are there's so much interference from unshielded tech that this thing should be lighting up a robot brothel's open sign."

"And it's not," Andy says flatly. He's doesn't exactly know what that means for them, but he doubts that it's anything good.

"I'm going to try and see when we are." John scrambles up the rocks. Reaching the top, he looks around. "You've got to be kidding me."

"What?" Andy climbs up after him.

"Over there." John waves his hand.

Andy turns to look where he's pointing, his eyes widening as does. "Dinosaurs."

Below them on a grassland punctuated by large outcrops of rock is a herd of huge, long necked dinosaurs browsing equally huge tree ferns.

"Yeah." John sits down on one of the rocks and opens his wrist band again, and starts pressing buttons

"There are dinosaurs," Andy says again, as he stares open mouthed at them. "Why are there dinosaurs?"

"Because we're in the past."

"Oh god," Andy sits down hard. He feels cold and sick. They are trapped in the past, their way home is broken and he's supposed to be meeting up with the lads from the station for a stag do in about ten minutes. And he's supposed to be going round to his mum's tomorrow to help her clear out the loft, although planning that after a stag do probably hadn't been a good idea. Even so, shifting boxes of junk with a hangover sounds a lot better than being trapped in the past with only dinosaurs and very annoying man in a fancy dress for company.

"Any more stupid questions, or are we done for the day?

"Sorry," says Andy, not sounding sorry at all. "Only I've just been chased by a fishman with a laser gun, nearly been exploded, and now I'm trapped in bloody Jurassic Park with a man who looks like a reject from an Adam Ant convention. So no I'm not having a good day."

"Never a dull moment with me around," John says with a grin, not seeming to care that Andy is annoyed and upset. "Seriously, I've got out of worse loads of times. We just need to stay alive while this thing recharges and then we'll go back. It'll be like you've never been gone."

"Really?" Andy says, clinging to this bit of information like a lifeline.

"Yeah."

"So you're not going to run off and when I'm not looking then?"

"Of course not," John reassures him. "I need somebody around to watch my back. Can't get us home if I'm lunch for some oversized lizard, can I?" Not waiting for Andy to answer, John gets up and starts to walk off. "Come on then."

"What are you doing?"

John shrugs his shoulders. "Find food, shelter, the usual."

"You've had some training then?" Andy asks, trying not to sound too relieved that they won't be reliant on his own skills. Somehow watching a few episodes of Ray Mears and an outward bound weekend in the Lake District isn't likely to cut it.

Climbing down the slope to reach the grassland below, John says, "Did a bit as basic training when I was at the Agency. Should be enough."

Andy follows him down, and when they both reach the bottom, he says, "Which Agency is that then?" John's accent is sort of American, so he wonders if it might be CIA.

"Time Agency." John stares at him, looking like he's trying to work something out, before saying, "You asks a lot of questions, don't you?"

"Well I am a police officer."

"You?" John laughs. "What were you? Head of pointless questions division? Officer in charge of the bleeding obvious?"

"No," Andy says evenly, knowing that losing his temper and shouting at him isn't going to help. "I'm just a regular police constable who gets on with his job."

"That's a bit dull isn't it?" John sounds disappointed. "Where's your sense of adventure."

"I'm not sure I've got one," Andy says remembering a previous girlfriend saying almost exactly the same thing. Swimming with sharks hadn't been his thing then, and three years on still isn't.

"Any way," Andy continues defensively, "I joined because I like like helping people. I like knowing that I've made a difference."

"So I'm stuck with the last of the good guys, huh?" John seems to find that genuinely amusing. "I suppose it could be worse."

"Yes, it could." Andy sits down on one of the boulders. "You could be stuck with somebody like you."

John laughs, and slaps him on the shoulder. "You're alright."

Walking across the grassland to the nearest of the rocky outcrops, the dinosaurs turn their long necks to regard them with bored curiosity, before going back to eating huge mouthfuls of leaves.

Weathered and worn, the first outcrop has plenty of nooks and crannies, but nothing large enough for them to use as shelter from the weather or protection from a hungry dinosaur.

After looking at several more of the outcrops they eventually find a cave that will do. It isn't ideal, the roof, for about half its length, is too low for Andy to stand upright, and if the rain blew in from the wrong direction it probably wouldn't be all that dry.

It's dry now though, and the entrance, while big enough for a person is too small for most of the dinosaurs that they've so far seen. It's about as secure as they are likely to get, and with the sun starting to get low on the horizon, Andy knows that continuing to search for somewhere better isn't practical.

Despite appearances, a 19th century military jacket, a pair of snakeskin cowboy boots and carrying a samurai sword, John is surprisingly practical. It's a practicality the Andy suspects could easily dip into ruthlessness if the situation called for it. John is, he decide, the sort of person you want on your side, as having him on the opposing one would be a very bad idea.

Leaving the cave again, they start on the next to look for food and water.

Transporting water from one of the numerous little streams that criss-cross the grassland proves to be easier than Andy had initially though it would be. By the side of one of the streams there are several large nut shells.

Using one of the shells, which, when whole, must have been about the size of a football, John collects water from a stream. He hands it to Andy, saying, "Carry this, about time you did something useful."

John then turns his attention to getting some food.

"Pretty rare for fresh meat to be poisonous, well in carbon based life forms," John says, pointing his laser pistol at a large lizard that is catching the last of the evening sunlight on the top of a flat rock.

"Eating it won't change the future will it?" Andy asks. His knowledge of time travel dos and don't is limited to films and TV series – and generally changing things in the past, however small was a bit no-no.

"What? Eating a lizard?" John says, surprised. "Of course it won't. The time stream doesn't work like that. Now if this was the king of some intergalactic empire it wouldn't be the best idea, but this-" John takes the shot. "Really isn't going to make any difference."

"You make time sound like it's alive."

"Maybe it is," John says sounding like he doesn't particularly care one way or the other. "Might explain why it can be such as bastard sometimes."

Andy's not totally sure why John thinks this, and he suspects that he answer will be so complicated or ridiculous that he will regret asking it. So he doesn't.

Taking the lizard and the water back to the cave, Andy wonders just how they are going to make any of it safe to eat. Raw lizard and water that who knows what has swum or peed in sounds like the recipe for ending up with something very unpleasant.

Before Andy can ask if John has any bright ideas about what they can do, John takes the nut shell of water from him and puts it down by the mouth of the cave.

"Look and learn," John says as he aims the gun at the rock, then fires. This time rather than a short burst, there's a continuous beam of yellowish light that John keeps trained on the rock until it starts to glow faintly red.

Using two sticks to pick it up, John drops it in the water filled nut shell. The water starts to bubble a few seconds later.

"So much more than a pretty face, aren't I?" John says with a smirk. "Now where's that lizard?"

Andy lets John sort out the lizard and goes to collect some fire wood from.

There's a reasonable amount near to the cave and it doesn't take Andy long to get what he hopes is enough to get a decent fire going.

Now that the sun has almost set the temperature is starting to drop, and Andy suspects that by the time it gets to the early hours of the morning it'll be uncomfortably cold without any sort of heat source or bedding.

Lying on the bare stone of the cave floor isn't likely to help matters, so Andy gathers up some of the large, fern like leaves and takes them back with him.

Putting the branches in a heap by the mouth of the cave, Andy spreads out the ferns across one of the flatter sections of floor inside.

By the time he's finished, John has arranged the heap of firewood into something more usable.

Taking out his laser gun again, John changes the setting on it and fires into the pile of twigs and branches. It only takes a few seconds for flames to start flickering amongst the wood, and smoke to curl upwards into the rapidly darkening sky.

A little later, and with the lizard cooking over the fire, Andy decides that it's time to asks John just how long they are likely to be stuck there.

"You said we'd have to wait for your time travel thing to recharge before can go home, how long is it going to take?"

"It's a vortex manipulator. And the answer is I don't know. It could be two minutes, it could be never."

Andy tries to blank out the never part, and says, "You don't know how it works then?"

"Of course I know how it works." John prods the fire with a stick sending up a shower of sparks. "I just don't know when the Rift is going to open."

"Rift?"

"Big hole in time and space that dumps all manner of crap on Cardiff? Ringing any bells?"

"No, but it does explain a lot of things." Like the men who had disintegrated, the Roman centurion turning up in the high street and the numerous reports of odd creatures in boiler suits. "How is it going to help us though if all it does is dump weird stuff where you don't want it?"

"It's filled with Artron and Huon energy with I can use to power up the manipulator."

"Really?" Andy says sceptically, as it sounds like a load of techno babble to him.

"Yes, what do they teach you at school in your century?" He gives Andy a rather despairing look.

Not stuff that sounds like it should belong on some sci-fi show, Andy thinks. "I suppose you got taught all that when you joined the Time Agency?"

"That and a few other things. Although whenever it was getting fun they'd just send you off to rehab."

"They had a rehabilitation program to stop people having fun?" Andy asks wondering just how strange the future is.

"No, it might as well have been, believe me. They sent me on all sorts of them," John says, throwing another piece of wood on the fire. "Drink, drugs, murder. They even offered me the sex one, but that really is taking all the fun out of life."

Andy looks shocked. "You've killed people?"

"Part of the job." John shrugs, and pokes the lizard with the end of his knife. "All the Agents went to them at one time or another. You turn up to one too many briefings drunk or stoned, either because you've been having a good time or because you've seen to many things you can't handle, and you get drink or drug rehab. You get a bit too trigger happy carrying out your job or you stop worrying about the collateral damage then you get murder rehab. It's simple really."

"It was sort of like being a soldier then?" Andy asks, trying to find a frame of reference, because he really doesn't want to think of John as a murderer.

"Not really, sort of a police, spy, mercenary mix." John lounges back by the fire. "It was fun while it lasted."

Andy gives him a questioning look.

"Disbanded. Too much corruption, too much abuse of power. Too expensive. Take your pick."

"You miss it then?" Andy leans forward, interested in what John has to say.

"Sort of, I guess," John says, sounding like he's not really given it much thought. "There were too many rules for me though."

"Let me guess, you don't do rules?" Andy says, wondering how somebody's like John ever fitted into any form of command structure, and how he'd ever got managed to get promoted to Captain.

"Rules are for people who are too stupid to think for themselves." John pokes the lizard again, and then, deciding that it's cooked enough takes it off the fire.

Splitting it lengthways down its back, John hands half to Andy. "Probably best to eat it while it's hot."

"Thanks, I think." Normally eating something like this wouldn't be something that Andy would even consider, but right now he's hungry enough to barely give it a second thought.

Once they've eaten, Andy says, "What you said about rules, I don't think that's very fair, rules are there for a reason."

"I don't follow other people's rules, never have done," John says, sounding proud of the fact. "I have few of my own though."

"And they are?"

"Eat when you can, sleep when you can, and fuck when you can, because tomorrow you might be dead."

"And that's all?" Andy says shocked. Although whether it's the self-serving bluntness of it or the rather fatalistic attitude he's not exactly sure.

"No, there are a couple more. Don't piss off people with time travel and don't go back anywhere twice."

"That must be hard," Andy says, wondering what it must be like not to go home again. Because he is going home, and it will be soon, and he's determined that he's not about to let himself start thinking otherwise.

"Not really." John picks a few of the bones out of the remains of the lizard and puts them to one side. "Whole of time and space out there to play with – why would I want to limit myself to one little corner of it?"

"I guess there's that," Andy says, wondering what it must be like knowing that you can go anywhere and any when ever you want to. It sounds like an amazing, impossible dream. "I've lived in Cardiff all my life. I can't really imagine being anywhere else."

"You trust me to get you home then?"

"I have to," Andy says quietly, really not wanting to think about what will happen to them if John can't get them back to Cardiff.

"You got somebody waiting for you then?"

"No." Andy shakes his head. He's got friends and family, but he knows that's not what John is asking.

"Huh, you seemed the type," John says sounding surprised that he's got it wrong.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Andy asks, sure that he should be offended, but not completely sure of what John is insinuating.

"I just though you'd have a wife and a fat little baby waiting for you." There's a wicked glint in John's eyes, and it's obvious that he's trying to provoke some kind of reaction out of Andy. "I mean you're Mr twentieth century guy. Nice, reliable, dull. What girl wouldn't want that?"

"Twenty first actually." And going by most of the girlfriends and the very occasional boyfriend that he's had, nice, dull and reliable doesn't seem to be something they want. Or perhaps the dull cancels out the other two – it might explain a lot about why none of them lasted more than a few months.

"When you're from the fifty first century it all seems pretty much the same." John yawns and then says, "That's enough questions for tonight. Time to sleep."

Andy wonders whether he should suggest they take it in turn to keep watch in case something large and hungry turns up in the middle of the night. He decides against it though as he suspects that he'd be the one stuck keeping watch.

Even with the fire, the night is cold, and the ferns he's spread on the floor of the cave do little to reduce the chill.

Lying down on the ferns, about as far away from John as he can and still be on them, Andy tries to get to sleep.

After a few minutes of try and failing to get comfortable or warm, Andy knows what the only really solution is. "I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but we'd be warmer sleeping together."

"And what way is that?" John asks moving closer. "Because I can take it all ways."

"Not like any of the things you're thinking of," Andy says, moving onto his side, so that John can lay with his back against his chest. "I'm just talking about sharing body heat, that's all."

John settles back against him. "You don't know what you're missing."

"I'm okay with that," Andy says, closing his eyes. "So go to sleep."

John laughs, but doesn't say anything else.

It's not any more comfortable, and if they are still stuck here tomorrow night, Andy tells himself, they are definitely getting more leaves. It is a little warmer though, and eventually they fall asleep.

 

x0x0x0x

 

They are still stuck there the following night, and the night after that. The days drag one into another.

Get water, get firewood, get fish or lizard, cook said fish or lizard, get more firewood, get more water, and repeating in a seemingly endless cycle. It's tedious, and Andy thinks that when, he's not ready to even think if yet, they get back home, he'd never going to complain about being on speed trap duty again.

Despite the tedium, and often being hungry, Andy finds that in an odd sort of way he's actually enjoying himself. And he knows that is due in no small part to John being there.

John's increasingly improbable and lewd stories about his career in the Time Agency and his adventures out of it help to pass the time. Andy thinks it makes his own life sound dull by comparison, and he wonders if there would be any possibility of seeing any of the places John has talked about when the Rift final opens and gets them home.

Sitting on the edge of a large lake, acting as look out in case any of the rarely seem carnivorous dinosaurs puts in an appearance, Andy watches John, who's standing in the shallows, try to catch fish with an improvised spear.

He'd be lying if he said that he didn't find John attractive. There's a devil may care cockiness about him that Andy is certain would be irritating in many people, but in John it's all part of the appeal.

John is, Andy thinks, what Captain Jack Sparrow would be if he were re-imagined as a space pirate. He's fascinating and infuriating in equal measure,

The fact that several of John's comments suggest that he wants him, wants to have him, is more than a little flattering.

Andy is sure that making love wouldn't be the word for what they'd be doing, and even sex seems a little inadequate for what being with John would surely be like. So while Andy isn't usually all that keen on crude language, fuck really does seem like the only word that comes close. It would be something as rough and as primal as the land they find themselves in. The whole idea of it is really rather appealing.

Andy is still trying to decide whether John actually means any of what he's said, whether John will make a move on him or if he should just take the initiative next time John makes one of his comments, when John wades back over to him.

"No luck?" Andy asks, hoping that John hasn't noticed that he's spent more time looking at him than keeping an eye out for hungry dinosaurs.

John shakes his head, then says, "What do you think about eggs?"

"They're okay," Andy says, wondering where John is going with this.

"And they don't run or swim away when you try to catch them," John adds, sounding like he doesn't think that Andy has managed to think of that.

"No, their mothers just try to eat us instead."

"You worry too much." John starts to walk away from the lake. "Come on, it'll be easy."

Somehow Andy doubts it.

There aren't any nests that they can see on the grassland, so a little reluctantly Andy follows John to where the trees and vegetation thicken to form a densely forested area.

It's hot and humid under the trees, the air teaming with small flying insects, while all around them unseen creatures croak and squeak and squeal.

Andy misses the openness of the grassland, at least there he could see if something large and angry was after him.

There's fruit and fungus growing on a lot of the trees, but none looks even a little bit familiar, and Andy doesn't think that they've got the stage where it's worth risking eating some.

Andy is just about ready to give up and suggest that the go back to the lake and he'll take a turn at fishing when John grabs his arm, and then points to clearing just ahead of them.

In the middle of it there's a large mound of earth and leaves, and in the shallow depression on the top of it there are about a dozen large, speckled eggs.

"Told you there'd be some here," John says walking over to it. "You keep watch."

There's a rustle in the bushes off to the side of the clearing, and a blunt nosed scaly head pokes through, followed by a thick neck and short stubby arms.

Andy doesn't know much about dinosaurs, but this looks like a mini T-Rex, although mini isn't all that correct as it's probably still about the size of a small car.

It slowly turns its head to look at Andy, its jaws opening to reveal large, pointed teeth.

There doesn't seem to be anything to be gained by staying quiet and hoping it doesn't notice them, so waving his arms to make sure he's got John's attention, Andy shouts, "It's seen us,"

"What are you waiting for then?" John scrambles down out of the nest, with only the briefest of glances at the T-Rex. "Run!"

The dinosaur roars, and then steps in to the clearing.

Branches, leaves and vines whips past Andy in a green blur as he runs without a thought of where he's going apart from away.

The thick forest suddenly gives way to blue sky, and Andy skids to halt. The land in front of him falls away down a sheer cliff face to a deep pool of water many feet below.

He's staring down at it, wondering whether climbing down is an option, when John stops beside him.

Behind them the dinosaur roars, the sound echoing round the cliffs as it crashes through the undergrowth.

John looks over the edge, before turning to Andy with a devil may care smile, saying, "I hope you can swim."

Before Andy has a chance to answer, John leaps off the edge. He hits the as the water as the dinosaur breaks out of the trees just behind Andy.

"Oh shit," Andy says mostly to himself, and then dives in after John.

The impact with the water isn't as bad as Andy feared, as it's deep with no rocks or fallen trees just below the surface to crash into.

Treading water in the middle of the pool, Andy looks around. Above him at the top of the cliff the T-Rex roars, annoyed at losing out on an easy meal.

There's no sign of John in the pool or on its banks, and Andy calls out, "John! John, where are you?"

He gives John a few moments to reply, and then calls again. There's still no answer.

Worried that perhaps John had hit something when he'd dived in or the weight of all the weapons he insists on carrying has weighed him down, Andy swims to the edge of the pool. He's got to get up high enough to get a better view of the whole pool.

There's low mound of boulders along one edge of the pool and Andy climb on to them. There's still no sigh of John. The water in the pool is clear though and he can see fish swimming quite a few feet down, so it seems unlikely that John could still be in the water and remain unseen.

He's about to call out again when something growls just behind him, close enough that he's sure he can feel its breath on the back of his neck.

With a yell of surprise, Andy jumps down from the rock, and starts to run. He's only gone a few steps when the growl turns to laughter.

He stops, and turns round to see John pointing at him and laughing. "You should have seen your face."

"You are an idiot!" Andy shouts, walking back over to him. "Why would you do that? We nearly got eaten."

"It was a joke, don't tell me you don't have a sense of humour either," John says with a mocking smile.

"Not about getting eaten I haven't." Fear, anger, and adrenaline make him reckless, and he pushes John. "I thought you'd drowned."

"So you'd miss me then?"

"I didn't say that," Andy snaps, although he knows that it's about as far from the truth as he can get, but he's too annoyed at John to admit to anything else. "I just need you to get me back home. So you need to stay alive until then."

"Then what?" John pushes him back. "Then what, tough guy? You going to arrest me? Kill me maybe?"

John is too close, and warm and alive, and Andy thinks, too ridiculously attractive when he's angry like this. Not that it's real anger, Andy realises, it's all show designed to get a reaction out of him.

"Either kill you or kiss you." It takes Andy a moment to realise that he actually said it out loud.

"Really? Because I don't think you've got the balls for either," John smirks. "Nice guys finish last. And me, I always finish first."

Andy grabs the front of John's jacket, the gold braid rough and wet beneath his fingers.

"Well go on then," John taunts. "Or are you all talk?"

Determined to show John that he's not just talk, Andy leans in and kisses him.

John kisses back with an enthusiastic roughness that Andy finds surprisingly appealing.

Things move fast after that, hands exploring each other's bodies as they pull and tug at each other's soaking wet clothing.

Some time later they eventually manage to find all their clothing, and despite their haste, Andy is relieved to find that none of it is particularly damaged. A couple of buttons are missing from his shirt, but Andy things that they may have been lost in the dash through the trees while escaping from the T-Rex.

All the same, next time they'll have to be more careful with their clothes, as there's really not any way of getting replacements until they get home.

Andy is reasonably sure that there will be a next time, as John had been more than enthusiastic about the whole thing. It definitely rates as some of the best sex he's had, even with the realisation part of the way through that they were being watched by a curious reptilian-looking hippo.

After a week or so living in the cave Andy knows that both starting to look the worse for wear.

John manages to look sort of rugged though, while Andy suspects that all he looks is scruffy. He rubs a hand against the untidy blond fuzz on his chin. "When we get back to Cardiff you can come to my flat if you want."

"Planning some thing, are you?"

"A nice hot shower to start with."

"Big enough for two?" John asks, sounding hopeful.

"Probably." Andy's never had anybody in there apart from himself, but there seems like there'd be enough room. "There's a bed too."

John laughs. "I like how you think."

"We still need to find something to eat," Andy says, as they near the cave. "If I get some more firewood can you get a lizard or something?"

It feels ridiculously domestic despite the fact that they are living in a cave and eating dinosaur for tea, and Andy realises that when they eventually get back to present day Cardiff he's going to miss it.

He'll miss having somebody to talk to over meals, miss John's optimism which has made being here so much better, and miss how, when he's asleep, John curls against him. And if he's honest he miss the sex.

Would John leave once they got back to Cardiff, off to travel time and space? And if he did would he ever come back? Andy doesn't know, but the idea of it rather depressing.

He can't see John wanting to say in Cardiff though, and he wonders if he asks if John would take him with him? And if John actually says yes, whether he'd be able to leave his life in Cardiff behind and go. Once he knows he would have said no – he'd said no to an ex once who'd wanted them to move to Bristol, yet for John he fairly sure he'd say yes to leaving the planet.

Andy is still thinking when John returns carrying what looks like a very ugly duck with a beak full of teeth and claws on the end of its wings.

Putting it down by the pile of wood for the fire, John says, "There was a whole flock of them flying over, all seemed a bit freaked out."

Before Andy can ask if John saw what had caused it there's a rumble like distant thunder. But instead of fading it builds, until the ground starts to shake, and the wind rises until the tree ferns are nearly bent double by the force of it.

Sheltering in the mouth of the cave Andy watches as the sky darkens, the bright sunlight obliterated as thick, grey ash starts to rain down to blanket the land.

For a few moments none of it seems to make any sense, then memories of TV documentaries come back; the dinosaurs had been wiped out by an asteroid hitting the Earth.

The look on his face must say it all as John says, "Yeah, our timing sucks."

"What are we going to do?" Andy asks, staring at the ash that's fast piling up outside.

"Not much we can do. So we might as well go out having some fun," John says, taking off his gun belt and dropping it on the floor of the cave.

"You want sex again, now?" Andy says incredulously.

"You got any better ideas?"

Andy shakes his head, then turning his back on the ash, he puts his arms around John.

Closing his eyes, Andy tells himself if he can't see the ash then he can pretend that it's not there. The air smells like the remains of a bonfire after the rain, and Andy lean down to press his face against John's neck, trying to block it out.

John's hands are all over him, but Andy knows that it's not distraction enough from what's going on. He doubts it's any better for John.

A bleeping noise interrupts his thoughts, and Andy frowns. After days of no working technology, the sound seems incongruous.

"It's bleeping," Andy says, pointing at the vortex manipulator on John's wrist as he realises that's where the sound is coming from.

"Temporal fluctuation alert," John says, taking his hand out of Andy's trousers. "The Rift is opening in about three minutes."

"We're going home?" Andy can't quite believe it. John's idea that time is alive and a bit of a bastard seems all too plausible right now.

"It's probably because of the asteroid. Shock waves, electro-magnetic disturbances, something like that." John grabs his sword belt and holsters, and puts them back on. "Now come on."

"You keep up with me, keep me in sight." John looks out at the thickly falling ash, the visibility down to a a few tens of metres, and still decreasing. "We've got one chance at this, and if you fall behind that's it."

Andy nods. "If I do, could you tell my mam something? I don't want her worrying."

John actually looks surprised. "Like what?"

"I don't know, something. It's better than not knowing." He's worked enough missing persons cases to see what not knowing does to people.

"Alright,"

"Thank you."

"Ready?" John pauses at the mouth of the cave, and turns to Andy.

Andy takes a deep breath, nods, and then they run.

The world has become a grey, featureless blur, the ash settling in drifts, covering the uneven rocky ground. John's red jacket seems like it's the only thing bright left in the world

Rocks and roots buried just below the surface of the ash threaten to trip him, but he keeps going, knowing that he's got to keep John in sight.

Time seems to mean nothing. He knows John said three minutes, but there's no sense of how much of that has past.

Something small and fast darts between his legs, and Andy stumbles, his headlong run becoming an uncoordinated tumble to the ground.

Coughing, ash in his mouth, Andy quickly scrambles back to his feet. The bright red of John's jacket that had been in front of him is gone. Alone in a dying, featureless world, Andy drops to his knees.

Suddenly there's a hand grabbing the back of his shirt and pulling him up. "I said keep up."

Despite what John had said about not falling behind, he's come back for him. Andy finds he has no words to express how much that means to him, and hugs John tight instead.

The embrace lasts for just a moment, before he takes hold of John's hand, as they start once again to run.

They slip and nearly fall a couple of times, but manage to keep going, until John stops suddenly and says, "This is it."

"What?"

"The Rift."

"Where is it?" Andy looks around in desperation, not seeing any sign of what this Rift thing might be.

"Right here," John says opening his vortex manipulator, the lights on it now blinking in to life. He presses a few buttons and then suddenly tendrils of golden light rip the ash cloud apart; a beacon of life and hope in the darkness.

John laughs, relieved, triumphant. "I told you I'd get you home. Now hang on."

"Like I'd let you go," Andy says, not caring that he sounds like he might actually cry, as he holds on tightly to John's arm.

The reappear back in the warehouse, the dust of the explosion still hanging thickly in the air. There's no time to notice anything else as there's the sound of running footsteps and then Jack, Gwen and the rest of the Torchwood team arrive.

Having to deal with Torchwood on top of asteroids and dinosaurs seems more than unfair, Andy thinks, when all he wants to do is go home.

"Something blows up and here you are," Jack says, sounding less than impressed. "Why am I not surprised?"

"What can I say?" John grins and walks towards Jack. "It's my explosive personality,"

Gwen stares at him for a moment and then says, "Andy?"

Andy waves wearily.

Turning to John, Gwen says angrily, "What did you do to him?"

"I didn't do anything," John says, sounding fed up. "Why does everybody always blame me?"

"I don't know?" Gwen pointing her gun at him. "Because they met you? Now what did you do?"

"I rescued him from man-eating dinosaurs."

"Dinosaurs, right," Gwen says clearly not believing him.

John sighs theatrically, and then points his wrist computer at Jack. "Have a look if you don't believe me. Time coordinates are all there."

Jack reaches out a hand, then stops obviously not trusting John not to try something. "Take it off and hand it to me."

Annoyed now that none of them have lowered their guns and that everybody seems to be ignoring the fact that he's there, Andy steps between Jack and John, and says "He's telling the truth."

"Really?" Jack says sceptically. "Because John and the truth don't go together in my experience."

"He sold faulty bees to a fishman who then tried to blow us up. John tried to time travel away, only I grabbed him and then there were dinosaurs and then the asteroid that wiped them out arrived. And yes that does sound like a complete load of bollocks, but it's all true, and if you want to hear any more, I want a cup of tea."

"The bees weren't faulty," John says indignantly. "It's not my fault if the bees didn't do what he wanted them to."

There's the sound of sirens in the distance, and Andy knows that the emergency services would have been called because of the explosion.

"Time to go," Jack says, looking at his team. "We'll sort this out back at the Hub."

"Well if that's it," John says, turning to leave. "We'll be going."

"Oh no." Jack takes hold of his arm. "You two are coming with us."

 

x0x0x0x

 

Half an hour later Andy, and still without his requested cup of tea, sits on the edge of metal table in what he's sure is an autopsy room.

The fact that he's in the secret underground base of what is probably the least secret secret organisation being checked to see whether he's brought anything unwanted back from the Jurassic is, Andy thinks a good example of just how weird his life has become.

Owen is brusque to the point of rudeness in checking him over, although Andy suspects that is mostly due to the fact that he doesn't like John. All the same, Andy has to admit, Owen does know what he's doing.

"Can't find anything wrong with you that a shower and a few decent meals won't fix," Owen says, ticking a couple of boxes off on a check list. "If you do start feeling ill in the next few days call Gwen, and I 'spose I'll have to go and check you out."

"So I'm alright to leave now?" Andy asks, surprised that they don't want to ask him any questions. He just hoped they let John go as easily.

"Yeah, I've done all I can."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Means I can't do anything about your brain."

"My brain?" Andy asks confused. He's not got a headache and Owen had said there wasn't anything wrong with him, hadn't he?

"Yeah." Owen puts the sample tube in to a machine on one of the work benches. "You like John Hart, so that's a terminal case of stupid in my opinion."

"It is?" Andy says, wondering just why all of Torchwood seemed to be on less than friendly terms with John.

"Yes. Now stay put and don't touch anything. I'm going to find out what's happening." Owen heads up the steps two at a time. Reaching the top, he calls out, "Oi, Jack, what's going on?"

Sitting in a cold examination room being ignored isn't, Andy decides, any fun at all. So once Owen has been gone for a few minutes, and he's got bored of trying to work out what half the odd looking pieces of technology are in the room, Andy decides it's time to get some answers.

He's almost at the top of the steps when he hears voices. Stopping where he's got a view out of the archway and into the main area of the Hub, but hopefully can't be seen listening in, Andy keeps quiet, and waits.

"You could have just left him there," Jack says, as he walk into view.

"Yeah, well I could have, but I'm on a promise with that one," John says sounding like he doesn't care. "So I really need him alive and in the same millennium for that."

"Really?" Jack says sceptically.

"Oh yeah." John's expression turns more serious. "But that's not why you want to talk to me, is it? You don't care about what I want to do with him."

"You're right, I don't. I want to know about Gray." Jack grabs John's arm, just above his vortex manipulator. "I want you to take me to him."

"No, you don't." John looks down at Jack's hand, gripping white knuckled to him arm. "And if you're going to leave bruises I'd better get something a bit more fun out of it."

"You're getting nothing from me." Jack releases him.

"You're still pissed at me, aren't you?"

"Last time you were here you shot one of my team, poisoned another, threatened the rest and pushed me off a building," Jack says fixing him with a cold stare. "So what do you think?"

John rolls his eyes. "Nobody died, lighten up a bit. You used to be fun."

"Maybe I grew up," Jack says, an odd mix of sorrow and anger in his voice.

"Right," John says sarcastically. "I suppose you gave up sex at the same time too? Because if you did that pretty bit of eye candy of yours is going to waste. Want to share?"

"John." Jack glares at him, the look in his eyes suggests John is skating of thin ice.

John seems to realise it, and says, "I'm trying to do you a favour here. He'd been with those things a long time, and in one of the rehabilitation centres for even more."

"It doesn't matter what he's like," Jack says, almost pleading now. "Or what they did, he's still my little brother."

"He doesn't remember you, he doesn't remember anything. You know me, Jack, too well some times, and there's not much that gets to me. So believe me when I say remember him how he was, and then let it rest." John steps closer to him. "I'm sorry, I really am."

Jack nods then covers his eyes with his hand.

Ianto chooses that moment to walk in. He takes one look at Jack, and then stomps over to John. He jabs a finger against his chest. "What have you done now?"

"Ooh possessive, I like that." John leers, all traces of sympathy gone now he's no longer alone with Jack. "Hey maybe we can all be possessive together. Handcuffs, a nice big bed, could be fun."

"John, shut up," Jack says wearily, turning away from them and walking towards his office. "Ianto would you..."

Andy doesn't hear any more as they go inside the office and Jack closes the door.

Sitting on the stairs, Andy waits until what seems like a reasonable amount of time has passed and then gets up, wanting to know what is going on.

He's about to leave when Gwen walks in.

"I just wanted to make sure you're okay," Gwen says, handing him a cup of tea. "Owen said you were okay to go home, I thought you might like a lift."

Andy had been planning on waiting up in the tourist office for Jack and John to finish talking, and then get a taxi home with John. He'd offered him somewhere to stay, and if he's honest John's 'I'm on a promise' speech to Jack, has got him hopeful for a little more than a pizza and mug of tea.

"I'm okay," Andy says wearily starting to feel tired now that everything is over. "Well, as okay as living in Jurassic Park for a couple of weeks will let you be."

"So he didn't try anything on with you?" Gwen asks genuinely concerned, as she sits down next to him. "Only you really can't trust him."

Andy gives her a curious look, wondering where Gwen is going with this.

"I mean it, Andy. Don't even let him kiss you."

"Why?" Andy says trying to sound nonchalant, and failing completely.

"He did, didn't he?" Gwen sounds angry now.

Andy pushes nerves down, then says, "Actually I kissed him first, so it's really not his fault. He didn't lead me on, or make me do anything I didn't want to. I know you're looking out for me, but I'm okay ."

"Anything..." Gwen echoes, eyes widening. "You and him...oh god."

Andy blushes. Discussing, even in incredibly vague terms, his sex life really isn't something that Andy is all that comfortable with. Especially as this is the first time he's mentioned to her somebody other than a girlfriend.

Gwen doesn't seem surprised though, and says, "Couldn't you, I don't know, find a nice guy?"

"What like your Rhys, you mean?" Andy says irritably, annoyed that nobody seems to care that he likes John, maybe even more than just likes. "All doughnuts and dull evenings in front of the telly? Why should I?"

"Because he's bad news, and I don't want to see you get hurt." Gwen sighs, seeming to realise that she's not going to be able to convince him. "And don't talk about Rhys like that, you know I don't like it."

"Sorry." Andy's not sure he means it, but he'll say it for Gwen's sake. "If it makes you feel any better I'll talk to John about it when we get back to the flat."

"Andy," Gwen says kindly, likely she's trying to break it to him as gently as she can. "He's already left. I guess he had somewhere else he wanted to be."

Andy swallows back something that could be anger or even tears, and says, "Could I have that lift home after all?"

Gwen links her arm through his. "Of course."

 

 

After parking her car outside the building that contains Andy's flat, Gwen walks to the door with him. "Do you want me to come in? I could make us some tea, if you like."

Andy sighs and shakes his head. He wants to have a hot shower and then crawl into bed and sleep for a week. And maybe, when he wakes up, all this will have been a dream. Only he doesn't want John to have been a dream. He wants is John to be real, he wants him to be here, wants to hear that mocking voice, and see that smug smirk that can only mean trouble.

He closes his eyes. He really doesn't want what they had to be over. John is best thing that has happened to him in a very long time.

"Andy, are you sure you're alright?" Gwen asks concerned. She puts her hand on his arm. "You can tell me you know, anything at all."

"I'm just knackered, that's all," Andy reassures her.

Gwen doesn't sound completely convinced, but says, "Well if you ever need to talk..."

"I know, you'll always there." Andy smiles. "And I do appreciate it."

Andy waits until Gwen has gone before letting himself into his flat.

Completely alone for the first time in more than a week. It's just him and the TV. The TV? He'd not gone out and left the telly on had he?

Walking through into the living room so that he can turn it off, Andy stops as he reaches the door, and stares open mouthed.

Sat on his sofa, a pizza box next to him and feet up on the coffee table next to a bottle of beer, John is flicking idly through the TV channels.

"What are you doing here?"

"You invited me, remember?"

"So you just thought you'd let yourself in?" Andy says incredulously.

"You said I'd always be welcome." John moves the pizza box to make room on the sofa for Andy.

"You took your time getting here, pizza nearly cold."

"I've spent the last half hour talking to Gwen about you."

"She likes me, doesn't she?" John asks, smiling. "If she's after a threesome tell her I'm ready when she is."

"No, she tried to warn me off. She says you're dangerous," Andy says sitting down on the sofa next to John. They need to do this, he tells himself, they need to have this all out in the open before they get in any further.

"You heard Jack say as much." John lounges back against the cushions. "It's not like I've ever made a secret of who I am or what I'm like."

"You knew I was there?" Andy says surprised. Knowing that John knows that he'd heard everything suddenly seeming like a big deal.

"Yeah. So what?"

"You and Jack, you were together once, weren't you?"

"You're not one of those crazy possessive types are you?"

"What? No!" Andy says horrified.

John looks slightly disappointed. "Pity, that can be fun. Well if you're playing at it, the real thing not so much."

Andy wonders if he'll ever understand John. He hopes that they'll have long enough together for him to give it a good try though.

"You were nice to him." Andy takes hold of John's hand. "You care about him, and you didn't want to hurt him."

"Maybe I was lying. Maybe I was just angling for a pity fuck."

"I don't think so."

"Okay I wasn't," John admits. "Even if I had been it wouldn't have worked. I'm not getting back in his bed any time soon."

"So where does that leave us?"

"Wherever you want it to," John says with a shrug.

"I like the idea of having somewhere safe to crash when I need it." John puts his hand under the edge of Andy's shirt. "Someone safe too."

"You mean boring," Andy teases.

"No." John lifts the edge of the shirt. "I mean safe. You're not likely to kill me in my sleep. You probably won't torture me for the secret of time travel, and I pretty confident you won't sell me out to intergalactic bounty hunters."

Shocked, Andy says, "You've had people do that to you?"

"I'm not a nice guy, and most of the people I know aren't nice either," John says, sounding fairly ambivalent about it all. "It's just a hazard of being me."

"Well I hope none of that happens to you again," Andy says, hating the thought of John getting hurt.

"What happens happens," John says carelessly. "Now I thought you had a shower you wanted to show me?"

Andy laughs, any worries forgotten, and leans over to kiss John.

He knows what they've got isn't going to be a wine, roses and chocolates type of relationship. He'd feel silly buying them for John and he suspects that it wouldn't even occur to John to do so it in the first place – and he's okay with that, he's not that kind of guy himself either.

No, what John is is the amazing, exciting friend who turns up and drags you the most preposterous adventure, which at the time is terrifying, but afterwards feels like the most wonderful thing ever. The fact that they are more than just friends makes it even better.

So while it might not be romance as most of the world would see it, and he suspects that people will think that John is just playing with him, but they know where they stand with each other, and they do care about each other. And for Andy those are the only things that really matter.


End file.
